One of the first things I tell my clients, either in consultation or session, is that the work you have to do to change your life isn’t going to be easy. There will be hard days, and days you won’t like me as your therapist. I’m okay with that, I expect it. and its true. I saw this post on Facebook that summarizes exactly why I share this with my clients.
In case the image didn’t load, its a quote by someone named Dr. Glenn Patrick Doyle. It says, ” Ironically, when we start to get better, we also often get sad– because we start to realize how much we’ve missed out on, how badly certain people fail us, what the younger version of us actually deserved. Healing involves healthy grieving. No way around it.”
What Makes it Healthy?
I believe that healthy grief is the type that you learn to feel and let pass. Getting bogged down by it or trying to suppress the feelings can complicate things and make it harder to work through the stages of grief. So, we have to make a conscious effort to allow ourselves to feel, reflect, and move forward.
Also, recognizing that grief isn’t a linear process. One day you may think you’re accepting your loss, and the next day you could be angry or bargaining again. Either way its important to call it by name so you can recognize it when/if it comes back to you.
Loss and Gain
One of my coping mechanisms is to focus on what I can learn from hard situations. When it comes to grief, I’ve learned that grief is uncomfortable and hard. The loss of the person, relationship, connections, etc., can change you to your core. It can also directly influence how you are in the remaining relationships you have.
I’ve also learned that If you want to allow the change, that’s okay. If you don’t like the ways you change, that’s okay too because you can do something about it.
As always, If something resonates and you decide that you want to subscribe or access services, you can enter your email address below or reach out using the information on the Contact page. You can also click schedule to request your free 15 min consultation. I am actively accepting clients in NC. Until next time, Take Care, Beloved!
